


Plastic Soldiers

by justafan (orphan_account)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Demon Dean, Fluff, Profound Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-16
Updated: 2014-10-16
Packaged: 2018-02-21 10:04:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2464313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/justafan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Sam was possessed by Lucifer, seeing the army man in the impala brought him back. Demon Dean has to find something to remind him of what matters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Plastic Soldiers

**Author's Note:**

> This is a very quickly written piece, don't be hatin' =) Here are your warnings: this was typed on my phone so editing is hard.. I just wanted to put together a little story of my take on this whole demon dean story line.. if you're bored and want to read I appreciate it. If you want a novel-esque masterpiece then please don't.

Sam is on sitting on the floor, barely out of Dean's sight. His elbows are propped on his bent knees and his face is in his hands. He's hanging on by a thread and he'd be stupid not to let go of it. His chest is tight, like he's under water waiting to surface. But, he's felt like that for days. Weeks even. Since he picked up that simple note.

'Let me go Sammy'

That's all he got. He'd held his dying, bleeding brother in his arms. He watched as he took his last breath. His brother whom he loved. His brother who damn sure loved him back. Except when he'd returned to mourn his brother's dead body he found only a note that said, 'Let me go Sammy.' That was it. No explanation, no destination, nothing. Sam couldn't forget a conversation they had a few months back. When Sam was dying and Dean let an angel possess his body they had the worst fight in their history. Sam couldn't forget what the fight came down to. Dean had told him that if the roles were reversed and it had been Dean dying instead.. that Sam would've made the same choice. And Sam had calmly and clearly told him no. He wouldn't have. He told Dean that he would let him die and accept it. He knew this had been a low blow to Dean. Especially after Sam hadn't tried to rescue him from purgatory. Sam knew that Dean would and had gave his life for him time and time again. So now that Sam was in this position, to do what was asked of him and let Dean go, he knew he couldn't. He had to fix Dean. He had to show him that he needs him. Sam can't help but think if he'd showed Dean how much he means to him earlier, then Dean wouldnt have ran off. Maybe Dean would want to be fixed. If Dean had known how much Sam loved him maybe he would've come to him immediately to be cured, like when he was turned by a vampire, instead of giving in to this darkness. Maybe their bond wouldve been strong enough to save him, like it always had been. If Sam had cared when it was important, he'd probably be riding around in the impala with his brother instead of sitting alone outside of a door, with a broken heart, contemplating whether or not to talk to the monster he'd let his brother become. If he'd been around then he couldve stopped Dean from taking that mark. He couldve researched it, he wouldve been there to protect him. It feels too late, and hopeless. But he'd spend the rest of his life trying. And if Dean kills him in the process, then he's ok with that. Sam gathers every ounce of strength in his body. Most of it was the regret, the shame, the anger at Crowley, more so the anger at himself, but the true motivation, his will power was sheer love. He stood slowly. He straightened his clothes and tried to smooth his hair. He tried to breathe but he felt like he couldn't remember how. He turned cautiously keeping his eyes on the floor and went to face Dean.

"Aww, is something the matter baby brother?" Deans voice chimed. Sam knew it was Dean but the sound had a new resonance. Like a snake that you were intrigued to hear hiss. Sam couldn't bring himself to look at Dean. He forgot how to speak. He had a million things to say but they were all stuck in a lump in his dry throat. 

'You've got me cuffed in here like an animal, the least you could do is answer my question.'

Sam paced , watching his feet. 'Would you care if I said yes?'

A low rumble came from Dean's throat. A sadistically happy sound. 'You always were the smart one, Sam.'

Sam thinks about it all. He doesnt know how to get through to this demon. He doesnt know how to convey that their brotherhood is stronger than evil. Then he remembers something.

Sam turned to face him. 'Would you say that Lucifer gets the credit for the origination of evil?' He asked, making eye contact, feeling sudden confidence and Dean could see it. He looked quizically up at Sam with an eyebrow cocked.

'Come again' Dean said.

'Like on a scale of one to ten of evil, Lucifer made the chart right? There are no beings worse or more powerful than him.?

Dean pondered a second but wasn't about to get caught in a mind game. 'What are you getting at Sam?' His voice was deeper, more even and not amused.

'I've been wondering.. trying to think of a way for you to want to be human again' Dean cut him off, 'Don't waste your time, you don't have much left... I'll make sure of that.'

Sam was taken back for a second by Deans threat. His entire life Dean had been his protector, even if a hundred years went by he'd never get use to him being a threat and it hurts his heart. Not from fear but because of something else. Love or loss? He wasn't sure. Sam regained confidence.

'When I was possessed by Lucifer, who is stronger and darker than you, I broke through it because I seen these little green army men in the impala. We use to play with them. I seen them through Lucifer's eyes and I beat him because those toys reminded me of you. How much I loved you, all that we'd been through, and that love was stronger than all the evil in the world. I won, Dean. I won because of you and now we just have to find something that will be your army man. The thing that makes you come through this.' Sam was quiet and felt proud. 

Sam heard no response except a fake snore from Dean. 

'Cut the shit Dean! You may be a demon but you're still my brother and I know you! Some of that had to have made you think.'

Dean glared up with black eyes. 'You know what I think? I think you're a fucking moron! All of this blah blah you're my brother, shit! Where was that when I was in purgatory? Huh Sammy? Where were you when I trusted Crowley about getting the damn mark because you sure as hell weren't around. Where was all this love then Sammy, answer that if you're so god damned loyal!' Dean flicked his eyes back to green just a second before he closed them. 

Sam turned to walk away. That drowning feeling was back. He knows that there is truth to his brothers rant. Sam felt guilty before, but now its worse. Dean's words had hurt him, but he knew they were Deans words. Not the demon's. So that means he's getting through a little... hopefully. 

There was a knock at the door.

'It doesn't mean anything to you right now but I'm telling you this so you'll remember it when you're human again. I am sorry Dean. I let you down then, but I'm here now and i always will be. I love you. I'll never give up.' Sam walked away and Dean didn't say a word.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

'Where's Dean?' Castiel shoved in the door before Sam could fully open it, panic was clear on his face.

'He's not himself Cas..'

'You dont think I know that?! We allowed him to become a demon for christs sake! And let him run off after that! His soul is twisted and mamed and evil. He's a demon, Sam! And all you have to say to me is, he's not himself!' Castiel somehow had made his eye level even with Sams and the angel although half a sickly human, was more intimidating than any monster he'd seen in a long time. Sam backed down and raised his hands a little to show surrender.

'Of course, Cas, Im sorry. I just... don't want you to expect more than... what a demon can give, just because it's Dean.'

Cas shot a glare at Sam that could've set the Earth on fire. 

'Where. Is. He.' Cas forced through gritted teeth.

'He's locked up down-' and Cas was gone. 

The door to the lock-down was thrown open with a force that made volcanoes jealous, and Cas erupted into the room without a seconds hesitation. It even caught Dean off guard. 

'Duh duh da duhhh... Castiel the butt pirate is here! To save the day I'm sure. Or should I say save me?' Dean mocked.

Cas was on his knees in front of Dean. Cas' face was less than six inches from Deans and he unleashed the full force of those angelic blues onto his friend turned demon. The sudden proximity and seriousness immediately halts Deans sarcasm. The angel was actually a bit frightening to the demon. He'd seen Cas' rage before, a few times actually, and it had never hit him the way that this did. Castiels eyes were full of strength. And power. Below that, the core was love. It was need. He needed Dean to be OK. His eyes demanded it. Dean had to look away.

'Come back to me.' 

'I'm too far gone Cas' It wasn't the strong, mocking tone of a demon. It was the tone of a hurt man.

'You're not. Come back to me.' He commanded.

'I can't... you don't know what I've done.' Cas could hear the tightness of Deans throat.

"Damnit Dean! What have you done that is worth you being this.. this.. thing!" Cas gripped Deans face. "Did you work with the king of hell? Because I did! Did you go power hungry and murderous because you thought you were god? I did! Did you try to end the world? Because your brother did! We make mistakes. Big, huge, catastrophic, apocalyptic sized mistakes and then we fix them. Its what we all do." Cas stands and paces frantically but his voice gets stronger. "Did you turn on your family? Did you hurt them? Decieve them? Don't you remember when I tried to kill you! I was being controlled, I was trying to kill you. You didn't fight me back. You said I was family, that you needed me and you know what? You got through! I stopped! Because I loved you!" Cas is kneeling again just inches from Deans face. He speaks softly now. "And that was more powerful than anything else. Dean, let me get through to you. Let me in. I need you Dean. You have no idea. I'm dying and I need you. I need you when I'm a good angel, or a bad angel. I need you when I'm human. Dean don't leave me, I need you." Castiel placed both hands around the back of Deans neck. Dean was openly sobbing. His eyes were swollen and red around the jade green, shining from tears. They were so vulnerable and hurt that you'd never imagine they'd ever been touched by the black of hell.

'I don't deserve it Cas. I've always felt guilty for not saving enough people. For letting dad die, for letting Jo, Ellen, and Bobby die. For almost killing Lisa and Ben, for letting Azazel get to Sam, for mom. The universe is finally even with me. I don't owe anything else." Dean sobs. "God, I don't have anything else to give. I've let this take me. I'm not worth fixing anymore Cas." Cas stood, letting his hands fall off of Deans neck. 

'Sam told me that his life was threatened. They called you wanting a deal and you said no. You told them to kill Sam but that you'd hunt him down. Why would you have hunted him down Dean? If you don't care what happens to Sam why would you have needed revenge? And, he told me about you and Crowley. Did you kill for him Dean? Did you really take the life of an innocent, kind human? Because I'm sure he asked you to. But you didn't did you? If you're so far gone then why do you have a conscience? Tell me what kind of demon doesn't kill? You're not a demon Dean. Your body right now, yes. But you, your soul, no. Dean, let Sam fix you. He needs his brother back. And, I love you, it doesn't matter what you've done. We'll get through this.' 

Dean looks up through tear filled eyes. His lips are parted and quivering. Cas puts and hand on the side of his face, and uses the other to wipe the tears away.

'Come back to me.' Cas says, softly, intimate and pleading.

'Tell me how' Dean finally replies, sounding stronger. Cas firmly places his lips to Dean's forehead and keeps them there until Deans breathing goes steady. Cas stands but doesn't walk away.

'SAM' Cas calls. 

Sam appears in the doorway holding a tray of blood filled tubes. Cas gives Sam a small smile to show him affirmation on the cure Dean plan.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

The last vile of blood was injected, the final words of Latin spoke. Dean is Dean.

After a hug that could've lasted a thousand years was over and all the tears were dry, Sam couldn't help himself. He knew he shouldn't say it, it was too soon. But...

'So you found your plastic soldier huh?' Sam give half a giggle and wiped the back of his sleeve over his eyes. He waited for a response. It came from a tear stained face with the smallest shadow of a smile.

'Shut up, bitch.'

'I love you, jerk.'

And Sam knew then that he definitely had his brother back.


End file.
